Writing Strategies

In 6+1 Traits of Writing for the Primary Grades Ruth Culham says that Word Choice is not about grammar. “It is about selecting words carefully to craft fluent sentences that create a lasting image in the reader’s mind.”

Nicola Davies does this skillfully in Bat Loves the Night. One really neat thing about this book is that not only is there very descriptive language that really helps the reader paint a picture in their mind of what is happening in the story, there is a “story” in large print about the bat and also a “factual” section in small print about pipistrelle bats on many of the pages. Davies does an excellent job combining the simple story about the bat and scientific information, fun facts, and trivia. This book is like two books in one!

Including similes in your writing can be used to make your story more interesting. Davies makes use of this element of figurative language throughout this story.

Create a chart with students and keep track of simile examples you find during the reading of Bat Loves the Night. Here is an example to get you started:

Simile:	Compares:	What does this tell you?
With a sound like a tiny umbrella opening, she flaps her wings.	The sound of the bat’s wings to the sound of a tiny umbrella opening.	-It sounds like a very quiet “whoosh” -It is a fast, soft sound
Bat plunges, fast as blinking…	How fast bat plunges to catch the moth to the speed of blinking an eye.	-Bat moves really fast
She beams her voice around her like a flashlight…	How bat uses her voice to the light from a flashlight.	-That her voice helps her “see” an area in the dark

In the story Bat Loves the Night, Davies makes use of descriptive words and phrases to create the bat’s world in the reader’s mind. For example:

-She unfurls her wings made of skin so fine the finger bones inside show through.

Have a discussion with your students about strong verbs. Discuss what other words the writer could have used that would have been less interesting, but mean the same thing in the story:

Strong Verb:	Less Descriptive Verb:
unfurls	opens
gliding	flying
plunges	drops

Check out the section on strong verbs in the book Razzle Dazzle Writing by Melissa Forney. There is a play to do with your students, a poem, and a list of strong verbs to copy and give to your students to keep in their writing folders.

Help your students learn to be more descriptive in their writing. Give each student a sheet of paper and have him or her fold it into 8 sections:

1. The sky is blue.	1. The clouds, white as new snow, shimmered in the turquoise sky.
2. Recess is fun.	2. My favorite time of day is recess because I get to run around and play games with my friends. We burst through the doors like a herd of elephants stampeding, so excited for our twenty minutes of freedom.
3. Joe is tall.	3. Joe is as lanky as a beanstalk.
4. The bat has fur.	4. The bat shakes her thistledown fur.

Each student will number their paper on the left side #1-4 and write a “boring” description of something ordinary. After finishing, each student will trade their paper with a partner who then has to improve the sentence by making it more descriptive on the other side of the sheet.

After discussing how to write an advertisement and looking at several real-life examples from the newspaper, borrow one shoe from several children in the class. Line the shoes up on the board. Have students secretly choose one shoe to describe in their advertisement. Their advertisement should include the following:

-A description of the shoe including what it looks like (size, color, condition, etc.), what it would be used for and anything else they can think of that would help the reader know which shoe they were talking about.

-Information and hook: how much the shoe costs, why the reader should buy it- remember, you need to be convincing so readers want to buy YOUR shoe!

After writing have students share their shoe descriptions and see if everyone can guess which shoe they wrote about. Discuss the examples of great description you hear in their writing.

For other lessons to help students learn to vary their word choice in writing, see the Word Choice chapters of 6+1 Traits of Writing and 6+1 Traits of Writing for the Primary Grades. “Suitcase Mystery”, “Delightful Descriptions”, and “Vivid Verbs” are good lessons to try with primary students. “Painting a Picture”, “The More Detail, the Better”, “Finding Key Words and Phrases in Captivating Text”, and “Expanding Small Phrases to Bigger Ones” are good lessons to try with intermediate students.

Sentence Fluency

In Bat Loves the Night, Davies uses varied sentence beginnings and sentence lengths to create flow. The story is easy to read aloud. In 6+1 Traits of Writing, Ruth Culham says that sentence fluency is an “auditory trait”. As we read we should hear a “melody”. Culham says that, “We receive more meaning from a piece as we are drawn into its rhythm and flow.” In the story Bat Loves the Night the author sometimes surprises us with a short statement and then other times uses longer sentences to, as Ruth Culham puts it, “marinate us in the images”.

For other lessons about sentence fluency, see the Sentence Fluency chapters of 6+1 Traits of Writing and 6+1 Traits of Writing for the Primary Grades. “Sentence Stetching” and “Off to a Good Start” are good lessons to try with intermediate students. “Find a New Way to Begin” and “Standing Sentences” are good lessons to begin teaching primary students about sentence fluency.

Along with the story about the mother bat, Davies includes interesting scientific facts about pipistrelle bats’ bodies, echolocation, feeding, where they sleep, etc. Have students pick a topic they know about or want to know more about (Mars, horses, etc.) and have them research important facts about their topic.

Facts About Mars:

1. The largest volcano in the solar system is on Mars. It is named Olympus Mons.

2. The Valles Marineris, the greatest gorge on any planet in the solar system, was caused when volcanoes erupting around it tore up the land, leaving a huge valley. Mars has a canyon system that is much deeper and much longer than the Grand Canyon in the United States.

3. Mars has seasons like Earth. This is caused by the tilt of the planet's axis, at a similar angle to the tilt of Earth’s axis.

4. Mars has polar caps like Earth, containing frozen carbon dioxide and small amount of water.

5. Mars is the fourth planet from the sun.

6. Mars is about 4.6 billion years old.

7. From Earth, Mars looks bright reddish-orange. The color is from the iron-rich minerals in its soil.

8. Scientists have found evidence that water once flowed on Mars and living things were once on Mars.

9. Huge dust storms sometimes rage over the whole planet.

10. Mars is much colder than Earth. Average temperature is –80 degrees F.

After researching, have students create a story about their topic where they can tie in their facts.

For our example, this student may write a non-fiction story about a group of astronauts that go to Mars and their exploration of the planet.

The Apollo 7 crew touched down next to an immense crater. After looking out of their craft and surveying the dusty landscape, they stepped out into the icy wind.

Mars has a canyon system that is much deeper and much longer than the Grand Canyon in the United States. Mars is much colder than Earth. Average temperature is –80 degrees F. Huge dust storms sometimes rage over the whole planet.